“Be shepherds of God’s flock that is under your care,
serving …not because you must, but because you are willing, as God wants you to
be …eager to serve; not lording it over those entrusted to you, but being
examples to the flock. And when the Chief Shepherd appears, you will receive
the crown of glory that will never fade away.” I Peter 5:2-4
I was in a conversation recently where the subject came up
about how a message is much better received when it comes from a humble
perspective rather than an arrogant one. When we come off sounding like we are
an expert or “know it all” people begin to resist what we are trying to share
and defend their own ideas more fiercely - even if they otherwise may have had
an open mind.
As I sat nodding in agreement, I asked myself, “I wonder if I use this principle in dealing
with my chlidren?” The answer was that more often than not I “lord it over
my children” thinking it’s my right, my responsibility as a parent. I have
lived longer, I have the experience and education and I want to pass it all on
to them so they, in turn will “get it” and become adults filled with knowledge
and character.
Something that was so clear when we are talking about
dealing with people in general just leaped out at me that day in regards to my
children. They are more likely to resist my message when I deliver it in an
autocratic way. They will also become more and more prone to defending their
actions rather than being teachable. I certainly don’t want this. I thought of
the example set for us by Jesus in John 13, when he washed the disciples’ feet.
He was their leader, their teacher, and he chose to show them by example the
path of servant leadership. What if I were to really practice this on a daily basis with my kids? Lead them by
first serving them, approach them from a position of humility.
As a mom, I know we serve our families pretty much all the
time, but often it turns into a martyr-syndrome, and we honestly
<strong><em>are</em></strong> looking for something in
return. I know often I believe it is my due, because of all that I do for them
every day, that they listen and obey. Then I am sorely disappointed when they
don’t. If instead, I saw my role as example, showing them the way by being humble and serving without complaining
or thinking I deserved something in return, then I might be surprised by how
they would follow with like behavior in their own lives. I would be growing
them in the ability to do right rather than preaching at them that they should
be doing so. It’s really the difference between ruling over our children and
shepherding them. I know which one I’d rather be doing. How about you?
{As seen on
adventuresinparenting.org}
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